A Place for Mom's Family

I've worked with a few seniors who have been very reluctant to move from either home or another community because of the friends and memories they have created.   One even cried in the marketing director's office while touring the new community.   I suggested the marketing director send over a disposable camera and a small photo album so the resident could take pictures with her friends during some activities.  Then, when she gets to the new community, she can put the photos in the album with a few new friends helping her.  It gives her an opportunity to tell the stories behind the pictures and lets her new friends and staff get to know her.   Save a few pictures to take photos at the new community and add them to the book to create continuity and remind her that there are plenty of new memories to create.   Families and marketing directors have loved the idea.

That's a great idea Carol!  I can't stress enough the involvement of as many family members in the transition of Mom and Dad into their new surroundings.  So many communities have so much to offer and when the family can be there to show their loved one around, perhaps going to a movie or activity with them to help them meet new friends as well as enjoy the specialness of their new home, transition is much easier. 

What a fantastic idea!  I also encourage families to spend their loved one's birthday in their "new home" by reserving the private dining room available to the residents etc.  This gives them the opportunity to still play "host" to their family and feel as if their family member is "coming over to THEIR house."  Inviting other residents/friends to share in the cake and ice cream can be fun too and allow the resident to "show off" their family!  What senior doesn't love to "show off" grandchildren or great grandchildren!  A short time is best, as the senior may grow tired, but a fun activity no less.  I used to have family members (when I was an Administrator) prepare their loved one's favorite meal at their own home, bring it to the community ,reserve the private dining room and enjoy a meal together!  Just a thought!

My mom is not too social, so the elder care options often have bubbly people who gush over the friendly events to offer.  I think Mom would find her niche and be as social as she wanted once the transition was made (she's stubborn and will do what she wants in the end), but its JUST ANOTHER excuse for her to drag her feet into the inevitable decision to move from the big house she's been in -- for 45 years!  If you have ideas. 

 Also, this is the first time in the forum so I'm not sure I'm posting correctly.

Hi 5 for mom!   Welcome to our commutity and thanks for posting.  Your mom's reaction is very typical.   Sometimes new residents do spend a lot of their time in theri own new apartments getting acclimated, however - they do have to venture out for  meals in the dining room and they tie in activites near meal times  so she would gradually start  being more social.  In her situation you may want to consider a respite stay - "a try it on" where she can stay for a long weeekend or a week.  With a commmunity ofr 60 or more residents Im sure she would be able to  make a connection with someone with a compatible personality and the marketing person would be a great judge of which  residents to pair up as potential friends. Best of luck!