Looking for HelpThree elderly sisters Sue, Darleen, and Sandra live in a house together. One night Sue draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?" Darleen yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the stairs and pauses "Was I going up the stairs or down?" Sandra is sitting at the kitchen table having tea and listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood." She then yells, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."
Wisdom of Larry, the Cable Guy
1. A day without sunshine is like night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
source: http://www.seniorresource.com/jokes.htm