A Place for Mom's Family

Here's my problem : my mother was living on her own in Florida for the last 14 yrs, I live in Boston. She is 74 and her mind is fine. She recently fell and wasn't found for a day or so and ended up in the hospital. After a few weeks in the hospital she was sent to a assisted living faculty. The place is "ok" and the people seem nice, but there are some issues with the place. I visited my mom for 1st time this week and it is very obvious she has skin cancer on her nose ( I'm not a dr, but it's clearly skin cancer, or a flesh eating bacteria) it very much bothers me that these 'nice caregivers' haven't done anything. If blood was gushing from her head I would hope they'd call a dr. But nothing has been done about the skin cancer. Also, there are not activies in this facility. It's a house someone turned into an assisted living facility. It seems like a place to wait to die in. She has extreme difficulty getting around but she can walk. I want to move her to my house, but I have no clue if this is the right thing to do. I can afford some in home health care, but not 24x7. Also, it's just me and I have to work. So she will be by herself for most of the day. Currently she shares a small one bed room with another patient at the assisted living facility in fla I would consider assisted living but not sure I can afford it. She gets $1000 per month in soc sec, and I can maybe pay $500-$1000 - I'm not sure what the cost will be, but heard its $3k per Month. At my house she will obviously have her own room and the bathroom is on the same floor. I'm not sure of I'm doing the right thing. She doesn't want to leave, but I can't trust her judgment ( she has skin can on her nose, you can't miss it , and she hasn't been to the doctor to get it corrected ) I also wonder if she has just given up and wants to die !?!? Any thoughts, suggestions!?!? Thanks in advance

 Patrick,

 I have just recently been there and this is very hard especially when your not there with them. First of all my father passed away suddenly and it changed my world completely. I had to go several states away to liquidate everything as my mom is in her 6th year of alzheimer's. I brought her to California and put her in a home. Prices probably a little hgher than florida I am not sure. The problem i had with two homes is that they move you in and asses mom.. The fees are charged at different levels and it all depends on what extra care she needs.There doesn't seem to be a regular industry standard on fees, it is all just what ever that homes range is. Due to the alzheimers' mom was charged between 2800 up to about 5500 until I moved her mostly becasue she is very healthy she just has to be reminded of everything. Her meds, her dressing etc. She is still able to do all the showering, dressing etc. so I am not sure that the 5500 was needed for her care.  We decided to move her to a private home and that seems to be working well. It is averaging about 3000 - 3500. I amnot sure how long it will last but i love the private home idea. I can see her regularly and take her out once in a while. The women who runs the home is very loving and takes good care of her. I hope his helps but call aroung and don't forget to call someoneat A place for mom. I have been working with them for over a year and they always seem to be able to help. Feel free to ask anymore if I can help. 

You have to take care of your mom as she is quite old to take care of herself. You have to take some decision either you have to moved on to your mom r take mom with you.As you have mentioned in your post that she is suffering from skin cancer in that case she needs special attention of a person who lives with her for 24 by  7

How about hiring a caregiver who can stay with her throughout the day and maybe when you get home you can be the family caregiver. Or if you have sisters or other relatives who can exert some time and effort in looking after your mom, you can ask them the favor