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My daddy...

Last post 05-03-2011 4:47 AM by Jennifer1980. 2 replies.
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  • 02-21-2011 1:23 AM

    • dianek
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 02-20-2011
    • Posts 5

    My daddy...

    ...moved in with me 2 years ago.  My normal life stopped and another life began.  I was totally devoted to him, and I took care of him with no help from anyone except my wonderful husband. 

    Things were in turmoil this past week. Daddy, 87, kept wanting me to take him for a ride, and I told him I couldn't. I didn't tell him, but Mom, 86, was sick and in ICU.  Wednesday night, I'd been without sleep for 3 days and I talked a bit cranky to daddy. Thursday, it really bothered me that I'd gotten irritated with him. When I got home from the hospital that night, he wheeled himself outside and I went outside and said, "Hey--I was a bit cranky with you last night and I am really sorry. I hadn't slept in 3 days, and I'm a hag.  Smack me if you want to!"  He grinned and I hugged him and said, "I love my daddy!" and I kissed him on the head.

    Friday morning, he ate a good breakfast and I went to tell him bye before I left for the hospital, but he was asleep so I left.  At the hospital, they weren't sure mom would make it though the night, but she did. She was much better and I even got her to eat! I was soooo happy! An hour later hubby called and told me daddy was dead.

    I am devastated.  I feel guilty because he told me less than a week ago that he wasn't going to be here much longer, and I told him he was fine and was going to be here for a long time.  He wanted me to take him for a drive, and I wouldn't.  What if he thought I was tired of him and he was getting on my nerves?  I COULDN'T tell him what was going on with mom because it would've killed him for sure.  What if he just wanted to spend a little alone time with me because he really DID know he wasn't going to be here much longer, and he thought I didn't want to be with him and was trying to avoid him? 

    My hubby and a friend were with him as he was dying and he shouted my name 3 times. It tears my heart out knowing that in his final moments on this earth, he knew he was dying and was scared and called for me---and I wasn't here.  If I had been here, I know I couldn't have saved him, but I would have held him and talked to him.

    I am so thankful that I apologized to him and told him I loved him the night before he died.  I would have lived with that guilt for the rest of my life.

  • 03-22-2011 11:01 AM In reply to

    • magsa
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 03-22-2011
    • Posts 4

    Re: My daddy...

    Diane,

    Your story is very touching.  I pray that you are able to find peace and solace knowing you took the precious time for more than 2 years to show your Dad the love and tenderness he deserved.  Hold your head high.  I am sure he felt your love each and every day.  I will pray for your family as well!

  • 05-03-2011 4:47 AM In reply to

    Re: My daddy...

     Hi Diane,

     My heart goes out to you. You did the best that you could and now he knows that. You are only human, prone to emotional distress. I hope you find peace.

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